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Conversation from Gchat

friend: EARTHQUAKE!!!
me: what?
me: in LA?
me: what are you doing online fool?
me: RUN!

Conversation on the Couch

I was talking about Wang Leehom and his η›–δΈ–θ‹±ι›„ album where he mixed hip hop and Chinese opera.

Friend: Hip hopera?

Conversation on Text Messaging

My friend got into a car accident. I called him, but he didn’t pick up so I texted.

Me: Dude i just heard. Glad you made it out ok. Lemme know if you need anything.

Friend: Yo mamma so fat if she were in my backseat i wouldn’t have gotten a scratch. Although the guy that hit me might have died.

Hell yeah. Get well soon man.

Conversation from Gtalk

This is why I like hanging out with her.

Me: have an idea of where you want to go (for dinner)?
Friend: hmm
Friend: i have a stain on my shirt, so nowhere too nice…

Conversation on the phone

Me: Are you sure?

Friend: Yes.

Me: Are you sure?

Friend: Yes. Look at me, Nien.

Conversation from Lunch

So a Chinese guy walks into a restaurant and says this:

Me: I’ll have a breakfast burrito.

Then his El Salvadorian friend says this:

Friend: I’ll have a breakfast eggroll.

Conversation at the Bar

I was out the other night at this bar. I was sort of just hanging out, looking around to see what the place was like when two girls walked up to me. One of them was Asian and we chatted and then she introduced her friend like so:

Girl: And look! My friend – cute white girl!

Yup. That’s how it is these days.